OT house fire...
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This may be grounds for you to get the kids. It is an example of her being neglegant and possibly endangering the children. It would definately raise doubt in a custody hearing. Good luck man, and hang in there.... this too shall pass!
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Keep posting the rants here, better here than losing it at home and reaping the consequences. Play it smart, be professional in your approach to it all, that is the best way to act and secure the kids etal. Losing it with her will never be a good thing once this enters the courts. Take note of everything including the police/fire report as it will be of use to some effect at a later date. Bon chance mes ami!
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I went through a nasty divorce four years ago in which I won full legal and physical custody of my daughter. My ex did a number of stupid things like this and it should show she cannot care for a child; but you must be careful because once you start attacking her in that fashion she'll usually return back. Usually a pysch eval is done and stuff like this comes out. Also most lawyers do not wish to get into a ugly divorce. FWIW - when all is said and done my divorce cost me almost $120k, took everything I had but well worth it. My daughter means more to me than her mother ever did.
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If the house is destroyed the silver lining is that the insurance money is now liquid and can be split up between you both. Our next-door neighbors were divorced last year and the house is just sitting on the market. The ex-wife (the non-ahole in this instance) is in an apartment waiting for the house to sell to get her portion, while her ex enjoys the house by himself. What motivation does he have to sell?
Back on topic, there may be some unintended consequences in going after your ex in this situation. If you tried to prove she intentionally set the fire, insurance might balk at paying which would complicate things even worse.
Custody makes people do (bad) things they wouldn't normally ever do. For now I haven't been through an ugly divorce, but have been witness to two different sets of friends splitting up. In both cases when one side was going to come up short in their eyes, they resorted to lying. The guy in one case was accused of sexually abusing their daughter and he spent months without ever seeing her. I doubt if the relationship will ever be healed. No evidence other than claims of the mother was presented. And if it was ongoing and she didn't do anything to stop it, what does it say about her?
In the other instance the dad wanted custody and claimed the mother physically and mentally abused their teenage daughter. Her dad suddenly became her best enabling buddy, buying her a car and supplying her with alcohol while looking the other way while her boyfriend ****ed her in the next room. Naturally she eventually got pregnant but hey her dad was able to punish the mother some more and have her write him a check every month.
I sincerely wish you the courage to make it through this difficult time with your dignity and honesty intact. Legal counsel is probably your best resource in this instance.
Back on topic, there may be some unintended consequences in going after your ex in this situation. If you tried to prove she intentionally set the fire, insurance might balk at paying which would complicate things even worse.
Custody makes people do (bad) things they wouldn't normally ever do. For now I haven't been through an ugly divorce, but have been witness to two different sets of friends splitting up. In both cases when one side was going to come up short in their eyes, they resorted to lying. The guy in one case was accused of sexually abusing their daughter and he spent months without ever seeing her. I doubt if the relationship will ever be healed. No evidence other than claims of the mother was presented. And if it was ongoing and she didn't do anything to stop it, what does it say about her?
In the other instance the dad wanted custody and claimed the mother physically and mentally abused their teenage daughter. Her dad suddenly became her best enabling buddy, buying her a car and supplying her with alcohol while looking the other way while her boyfriend ****ed her in the next room. Naturally she eventually got pregnant but hey her dad was able to punish the mother some more and have her write him a check every month.
I sincerely wish you the courage to make it through this difficult time with your dignity and honesty intact. Legal counsel is probably your best resource in this instance.
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223 Posts
Man, I am by no means an expert but I think you should stop posting any of this stuff on a public forum and get the best lawyer you can afford RIGHT NOW. It sounds like there are some very serious things going on here and all of this stuff could be used against you. I am not by any means telling you what to do but I can tell you what I would do.
1- Get the best lawyer possible.
2- Protect my children.
3- Document everything and keep copies of every report.
4- Protect my credit and finances. I would hook up with a service that alerts you when you credit is being used.
If you want your kids then you will need all kinds of documentation showing financial viability. Mothers have all the rights and judges always want to keep kids with moms.
Good luck, this seems like a real hornets nest that just got kicked up.
1- Get the best lawyer possible.
2- Protect my children.
3- Document everything and keep copies of every report.
4- Protect my credit and finances. I would hook up with a service that alerts you when you credit is being used.
If you want your kids then you will need all kinds of documentation showing financial viability. Mothers have all the rights and judges always want to keep kids with moms.
Good luck, this seems like a real hornets nest that just got kicked up.
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12,576 Posts
Hang in there bro! Just buy her a Camry and tell your kids to never drive with mommy.
Maybe the car will take care of your problem for you. In the meantime, just come here and kick the shit outta MrGrn. It cheers me up pretty quick. Try it!:woot:
Maybe the car will take care of your problem for you. In the meantime, just come here and kick the shit outta MrGrn. It cheers me up pretty quick. Try it!:woot:+1 on cease posting it and talking to others about it. Hate to say it but it certainly looks as it's heading to an arson case. The motivation to remove articles to storage prior to the fire overwhelmingly points in that direction.
Don't be surprised when both of you are interrogated and she is led away in cuffs.
Too often the demented side of life surfaces. Stay strong and keep your dignity through all of the shit that is forthcoming. Yes, get a consult with a a criminal lawyer immediately.
Don't be surprised when both of you are interrogated and she is led away in cuffs.
Too often the demented side of life surfaces. Stay strong and keep your dignity through all of the shit that is forthcoming. Yes, get a consult with a a criminal lawyer immediately.
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Emotions are high and we understand the need to vent, but I;d also strongly suggest you delete your posts on this public forum. No good comes of this info, for her....or you.
Good luck man. I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling with all of this.
Good luck man. I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling with all of this.
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5,440 Posts
Hang in there brother, went thru the same shite decades ago with my 1st wife, she got the house, car and 1/4 million..................AND IT WAS WORTH EVERY PENNY! Just be the best Dad you can, and take the high road. Even when she makes you wanna choke the life outta her sorry ass, just smile and be cool (it not only drives 'em bat shite 'cause they can't get under yer skin, but everyone involved will know who the "good guy" is, ESPECIALLY your kids, remember, THEY are the innocent victims here, and it's YOUR job to be their protector.) Keep on keepin' on brother, like my Dad once told me, "If you find yourself going thru hell, KEEP GOING!" Just consider it a LARGE deposit into yer personal kharma account! And even though it doesn't seem like it now, everything happens for a reason, without the previous shitestorm, I wouldn't have met my current wife who happens to also be my best bud. (although, I wouldn't have appreciated her in my younger, DUMBER years!)
Semper Fi! :rockon
-Rocky-
Semper Fi! :rockon
-Rocky-
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hope you pull through and everythign works out well in the end....
OT... how is it that all you guys with ex wives get shafted to the tune of house and $$$? wtf is that about? why do you end up being the one with the bill?
OT... how is it that all you guys with ex wives get shafted to the tune of house and $$$? wtf is that about? why do you end up being the one with the bill?
I do hope that she is not going to be your ex just because she left some stuff on the stove ... heck people make mistakes.
My Mum did this and house was saved because of our pet Cockatoo, as it started making funny noises before she left the house and so she went back and checked ... stove was in flames and managed to contain it to the kitchen, etc.
Anyway think of your KIDS and what is best for them, not you.
Pete
My Mum did this and house was saved because of our pet Cockatoo, as it started making funny noises before she left the house and so she went back and checked ... stove was in flames and managed to contain it to the kitchen, etc.
Anyway think of your KIDS and what is best for them, not you.
Pete
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342 Posts
My cousin is a NY arson investigator, so whenever i see him, I learn the best ways to burn down your house for the money. And he keeps saying "Put a pot of oil on the stove and go to the store" He told me one store of a guy who started to fry something, then some guys came in to do his driveway, so he was outside talking to them, and poof, black smoke billowing out the door. House didn't go up, but the smoke damage was enough
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5,316 Posts
damn bro. wouldn't wish your situation on my worst enemy.
a good woman is worth more then gold because they are so rare these days. a bad one can steal your money, years, ambition, dreams... & even your children thanks to these f'd courts.
life is absurd. no one is leaving here or taking any of these artifacts we obsess over with them. so burn the f'n house down. burn the f'n world down. time to make yourself happy. FTW~!
a good woman is worth more then gold because they are so rare these days. a bad one can steal your money, years, ambition, dreams... & even your children thanks to these f'd courts.
life is absurd. no one is leaving here or taking any of these artifacts we obsess over with them. so burn the f'n house down. burn the f'n world down. time to make yourself happy. FTW~!
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"that was easy" bam down comes the crooked shelf hahahaha epic
loved that video
moral of the story.... measure twice.... cut once
loved that video
moral of the story.... measure twice.... cut once
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