Joke

A middle - aged woman went to a Wal-Mart service counter and tells the
clerk she wants a refund for the toaster she bought because it won't work.

The clerk tells her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on ''Special.'' Suddenly, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming ! "PINCH MY NIPPLES ! PINCH MY NIPPLES ! PINCH MY NIPPLES !"

The befuddled clerk ran away to get the Store Manager in front of a
growing crowd of customers. The manager goes to the woman and asks, "Ma'am what's wrong?" She explained the problem with the toaster, and he tells her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.

Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming,
"PINCH MY NIPPLES ! PINCH MY NIPPLES ! PINCH MY NIPPLES !"

And doing so draws an even more HUGE crowd! ! In shock, the Store Manager pleads, "Ma'am, why are you saying that ? In a huff, the woman says, "BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY NIPPLES PINCHED WHEN I'M GETTING SCREWED !"

The crowd broke into applause and her money was quickly refunded !

"Picture this"
A dirty old indian walks into a roadside bar out in the middle of the desert and shakes off the dust and then sits down at the end of a dark bar. The bartender notices that the indian has a 6 gun in his pants and a dead cat in one hand and in the other he has a bag.
So the indian throws the bag down on the floor next to him and ask the bartender for a beer. The bartender gives the indian a beer and walks away to help another customer when he hears the pistol go off. The bartender turns around and just then the indian ask's for another beer so the bartender doesnt say anything and gives the indian another beer and when he turns around and starts walking towards the other end of the bar again he hears the pistol go off he turns around and the indian asks for another beer so he gives the indian another beer but has he is walking away he looks back to see the indian bite the dead cat and shoot the bag. When the indian asks for another beer the bartender gives him one and asks what he's doing with the cat and bag and the indian tells him that he just came into the bar to have a drink,eat a little pussy, and shoot the shit.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his zipper.

The bartender says, " Hey, did you know that you have a steering wheel sticking out of your zipper?"

The pirate says, "AArrg, I know mate, it's driving me nuts!"

My admin just told me that joke!

<TABLE WIDTH="90%" CELLSPACING=0 CELLPADDING=0 ALIGN=CENTER><TR><TD>Quote, originally posted by ricknadine1111 &raquo;</TD></TR><TR><TD CLASS="quote"> A dirty old indian walks into a roadside bar....</TD></TR></TABLE>

Hey, speaking of Indians.....

While riding one day, a cowboy met an Indian riding along with a dog and
a sheep. He began a conversation:

Cowboy: "Hey, cool dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"

Indian: "Dog no talk."

Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"

Dog: "Doin' all right."

Indian: (Look of shock.)

Cowboy: "Is this Indian your owner?" pointing at the Indian.

Dog: "Yep"

Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food,
and takes me to the lake once a week to play."

Indian: (Look of total disbelief.)

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

Indian: "Horse no talk."

Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool."

Indian: (Extreme look of shock.)

Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" pointing at the Indian.

Horse: "Yep" Cowboy: "How's he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly,
brushes me down often, and keeps me in a shed to protect me."

Indian: (Total look of utter amazement.)

Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

Indian: "Sheep liar".

lol@ lying sheep.