[Old Fart]

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally the doctor asks him what
happened.

Well, it was like this, said the man. I was having a quiet round of golf
with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to
look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had
something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail and
sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball..........stuck right in the
middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake.

"What did you do?", asks the doctor.

Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, "Hey, this looks like yours!"